(no subject)

Calc. I am mad at myself and mad at Mr. K (because he does not seem to understand that this test was a lot more difficult than expected and there were too many questions and he kept suggesting that the people who did badly were slacking off and didn't study but I studied for two hours) and I wanted to cry but I didn't. If this bad grade, making my overall grade much worse, causes me some sort of college problem or honor roll problem or GPA problem I am going to be so upset. I've been talking to several of the other people who got really bad grades (and by really bad I mean REALLY bad) and there's a nice bond there now, but I still got the worse out of those I spoke to. I don't believe I got the worst grade of everyone, though, but what difference does that make. I was an A student who makes the occassional B in math. Now I am an A student who consistently screws up Calculus and watches letters fall from her grade as fast as the Wal-Mart smiley faces rolls back prices on TV.

At least we have a grade enhancement opportunity. Even with the enhancement, the best I can hope for is a C, but I'll take what I can get. I am really, really worried. Everytime I prepare for a test, I say to myself that this time I will do better, this time I will pull my grade up. I attempt to study more effectively with each opportunity. And I do worse and worse. I slide down the slippery slope. (And you gave me a couple coordinate points, I could tell you the steepness of that slope and find how much area is between the curve and the x-axis by using LRAM, MRAM, RRAM, Simpson's, The Trapezoidal Rule, or analytically solving an integral because I'm actually not stupid.) I just feel very, very stupid in the Calculus classroom. More stupid than I have ever felt in my entire life.

It's a good thing it is the weekend.

( regional survey, to distract myself )